Some people say I set goals that are too big,  pick races that are too long.   But you have to set goals that are SMART. Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and finally Time bound. So I may pick races that are huge and I’m not ready for yet.  But that is the point.  To reach farther be better. Achieve more than you have in the past.  Setting a goal without being able to measure it makes no sense.   You have to see how far you’ve come,  how you’ve improved.  So yes I might set huge goals,  but I’ve got the determination and will to hit them.   Thank you for joining me on my journey!




Merry Christmas!  I hope you enjoy your family and Santa brings you everything you hope for.   I’m up before 6 not because I have kids ready to open gifts,  but because I want to get my workout in. Before all the chaos starts, everyone will be here at 11 and I have to work at 3:30 so off I go to get a brick in.   For those of you who don’t know what a brick is,  it’s a bike ride immediately followed by a run.   The name?  It’s called a brick because that’s what your legs feel like when you get off the bike and start to run,  bricks.   The goal of training like this is to get your legs used to the feeling so you can hopefully not have trouble on race day.   Today’s brick will be a shorter one I’m hoping for a nap before everyone gets here.   I hope you all have a wonderful day!

Pain :(


Pain that is what I feel today. Today the pain is crippling, I can barely walk.  Having osteoarthritis this has become part of my life.   Some days I feel great,  then there are days like today.   I still put 9 miles on my bike,  because if I didn’t tomorrow would be worse.   So I’ll soak it in a hot epsom salt bath,  take more of my prescription medicine, and hope tomorrow is a good day.  People ask me all the time why I still try to run,  the simple answer is I feel better after I do it.  The days I workout my knee feels way better than the days I don’t. It’s not like I’m running 10 miles at a time,  I’m running/walking intervals which my knee seems to handle well, short bursts of running.   Since I started training harder I have less days like today.  The pain is crippling less often.   I also take a couple natural anti-inflammatories that help.   This is my reality.   The scale is finally moving again,  and I’m hoping as more weight comes off it will help the knee by taking less pressure off  the joint.   Today is a bad day,  but I refuse to let it become everyday!

Training plans? !?!

I’m embarking on a journey,  one that I’ve never done,  one that is kinda scary.   It is a big race!   The first thing I needed to do was make a plan, starting with finding a training plan. So I asked around,  got advice,  and 20 different places to look. ….uggg how do I know what to choose?  Which one is best?   I even had a couple people that were gratious enough to send me training plans that they had used.   I’m so confused,  I know ideally working with a coach is the best route.  A coach is just not in the budget……not right now anyway.   So I poured over the plans that were suggested.  There are 12 week up to 26 week training plans.   After looking through everything I decided on one from  It’s 20 weeks long,  I’ve marked on my calendar when the big day to start is.  I printed everything out,  along with all the lessons from the Swim Bike Fuel program I did in November.  I bought a binder,  that will become my training guide/bible as I  embark on this journey.  I realized  during this process there really is no one training plan that works for everyone,  that you need to find what fits in your life.

Challenge yourself


I need a challenge,  I always have.   I need something to push me.  That’s why I race. I’m not fast, I’m not super athletic (although that’s changing) but I love a challenge.   I will push through being tired,  being sore. I will run with blisters, and lose toenails all to meet my challenge.  I found am amazing group on Facebook that is a challenge every month it’s  called Athena Virtual Iron (wo)man Challenge.  The basis of the group is every month you strive to complete the distance equivalent of am Iron man 140.6 it breaks down into 2.4 mile swim,  112 mile bike,  and 26.2 mile run.   Every month you also have an option to for a small fee purchase a medal,  that you get if you hit at least the half iron  distance.  This group has really pushed me.   I also admin a running group for single people called Running Down a Dream. We do a challenge of some kind every month.  I also have had a bet with Jason one of the other admins the last 2 months about who will get more miles.   I have beat him twice. …lol He says I won’t beat him this month. ……the loser has to make a video and post it to the group.   I told him after this month he can wish me happy birthday in his next video.   All of these things help push me,  motivate me.   I need that.   Having a goal helps me focus.  Tonight I  got home from class dead tired, but i still hopped on my indoor bike trainer and cranked out some miles.   No one will ever push me as hard as I push myself when I am faced with a challenge!

I am not fat


That’s how I felt at spin class today ^^^

Having weight loss surgery messes with your head.   It just does,  it takes your brain a while to catch up. I know it in my head this is part of the process.   But I took the same spin class I took last week,  except there was a totally different group of people.   I was the biggest person in there,  and mentally I know that I’m not as big as I once was. I was faced with this room full of skinny people, and I felt like a fraud,  like I shouldn’t be there.   I spent the first 30 min looking around comparing myself to everyone in there,  thinking how they were all wondering what the fat girl was doing in there.   Then it happened,  one of the skinny girls quit,  she just  stopped pedaling cleaned up her bike and left.   It hit me all of the sudden,  I realized that I still had plenty of fuel in my tank,  even though I  was bigger, I appeared to be in better shape.  I was sweating bullets,  and I had followed every direction the instructor had given us. Stood the whole time he wanted us too.  I need to work on how I talk to myself, like alot of people do. As a wise person told me today the only limits on what my body can do are limits I’m putting on myself.  Self talk is how we sabotage ourselves.  We should always be careful how we talk to ourselves,  because we are always listening……Make your Dreams come true, the only thing stopping you,  is well YOU.

Food for thought


I had weight loss surgery in June of 2014.  I have lost a significant amount of weight since then, and I’m still losing.  When you have the surgery they teach you to eat protein first,  then if you have room you can eat veggies,fruit.  So you become used to eating that way.   I am am athlete I may be slow,  and bigger than most (still working on that) but I am an athlete. I train with intensity,  and give it everything I can. I want to improve to become a better, faster athlete.  And to do that I need to fuel properly.  I realized a couple weeks into the marathon that wasn’t to be that I was not taking in enough calories to support my training. I was struggling to compete my workouts, I was exhausted.  I was discovering that being able to only eat about a cup of food in one sitting was not giving me enough calories to support long workouts.   So I contacted the nutritionist at my doctors office,  she pointed me to a sports nutritionist who would turn out to help me save my training.  I had to re-adjust my way of thinking about food again.   I had to add in more fat,  more carbs. After surgery I was eating about every 3-4 hours.  On rest days,  that is fine,  but on workout days especially long workout days I eat every 2.5 hours,  if it’s a long workout that day,  it is every 2 hours.  I burn sometimes 2-3 thousand calories a day. I think about food now more than I ever did before surgery,  focusing on getting enough in and working it around taking in fluids is hard.   When you have surgery you can’t eat and drink at the same time.   I struggle everyday with fueling my body for workouts,  knowing i need the carbs, but feeling guilty because it’s not the way we as wls patients are taught to eat.  I have an internal struggle everyday.   I get so irritated when people comment say things like you’re eating again?  Should you be eating that?  Is that on your diet?  I thought you weren’t supposed to eat carbs?  I really just want to swear at them.   I see the nutritionist every 2 weeks,  and she checks my food logs, I log every bite I put in my mouth.   I am doing exactly what I’m supposed to,  I’m tired of defending what I’m putting in my mouth. Please think before you judge other people’s choices.

Thinking back, Looking forward


December is almost half over….as I look back on this year, it is amazing where I was at this time last year.  I’ve had an amazing year.  I’ve met amazing friends, visited new places,  tried new things.  I’ve pushed my body further than I ever thought I could go.  I have discovered so much about myself, and I can’t wait to see what 2016 has to hold for me!  I plan on pushing even further,  seeing how far my body can go.  Hitting all my goals, hopefully exceeding them.  Trying new things,  having new experiences, and hopefully hitting my goal weight. There is a special new experience when I hit that number,  but it’s a secret,  I have a feeling with all the training I’ll be doing I’ll be hitting it sooner than later.   So as we near the end of the year,  I don’t focus on resolutions,  seriously who actually keeps them?   I set goals,  because working towards something is hard,  but if you have something to focus on it makes things easier.   Always keep your eye on the prize!

Being Me


I’ve recently been told,  that I hold back from people.   Honestly only someone who truly knows me would be able to say that.   To most people I’m a loud confident person,  who is always self assured.  To be honest that’s a really good act most of the time. There is always a war of self doubt going on in my head about whether I can do what I dream of.   If I look right,  if I said the right thing.   That’s part of the reason I started this blog,  to stop holding back and be the real me.   I’ve noticed as I’ve added new friends and unfortunately others drift away.  I’m not as good at hiding the real me,  and that’s ok,  I don’t have to make everyone around me happy. I can say no,  and some people say I’m stretching myself to thin,  but I’m doing what I  want, and if that means a little less sleep I’m ok with that.  In the words of one of my friends I just keep my eye on the end result.  So just remember no matter what’s going on in your life, always remember you need to make yourself happy.  I’m so thankful for the people in my life who remind me of that.



Today I’ve been thinking about my friend Kelly, she accomplished something amazing this weekend, her first 50k race.   While I have no desire to do a race of that magnitude now,  you never know.  I’m in complete awe of how strong she was and how amazing she was. She faced alot of issues in this race.  For one thing it was cold barely above freezing at the start.   The course was marked on Friday and someone pulled up the markings,  so Kelly like alot of athletes got lost. When she got back on track, she was last,  something she was upset about.  But in the last couple miles she dug out a strength that just amazed me. She’d been running over 7 hours already,  and she dug in and managed to pass the girl who’d been leading her for a long time.  I think she even amazed her self in doing that.  I volunteered for the race,  so I was able to see up close and personal the determination and drive that these athletes possessed.  It made me realize I can do it,  anything if I put in the work,  I will conquer any task I decide to tackle.  So 70.3 here I come,  because I know I have an amazing support system behind me.  The only thing that will hold me back is me. ……